Every Conversation Is an Opportunity Or a Cost
- Carly (CJ) Shorter
- 3 days ago
- 2 min read
As we head back into work, here’s a question worth sitting with:
What are you choosing, right now, today - in how you communicate?
Because being on autopilot is a choice.
So is disengaging.
So is being “honest” without being intentional.
And every one of those choices has impact whether we mean it to or not.
Intent ≠ Impact
I was reminded of this in a very personal way over the New Year break.
One of my closest friends brought up a comment I made as a teenager.
Completely offhand. Flippant, even.
I told her I didn’t think the shape of her new glasses suited her face.
There was no malice. No intention to hurt. Just what I thought was an honest observation.
What I didn’t know, until almost 30 years later, was the impact.
She remembered that comment. And from that moment on, she chose to
wear contact lenses instead.
That single, unconsidered remark stayed with her for decades. You can
imagine the apology I made.
It stopped me in my tracks and made me reflect:
How often do we really pause to consider the impact of our words?
Where We Start in Communicate Powerfully
One of the most powerful tools we teach in Communicate Powerfully starts here,
not with scripts or techniques, but with intention.
Before you speak, ask yourself:
What is my intention in this moment?
Am I trying to:
Make a request?
Share information?
Give direction or a command?
Build connection?
Clarity of intention changes everything.
When we’re unclear, our message weakens.
When we’re clear, our communication lands.
And when intention and impact don’t align?
That’s when misunderstanding, hurt, and unnecessary drama creep in.
How to try this today:
Before your next meeting, conversation, or Zoom call:
Pause for 10 seconds
Ask yourself: What is my intention here?
Speak from that place, not habit, not emotion, not autopilot.
It’s simple.
It’s not always easy.
And it’s incredibly effective.
And remember:
Words don’t just disappear once they’re spoken.
They land.
They linger.
They shape how people see themselves, and us.
So I’ll leave you with this:
What choice are you making with your words today and what impact might they have?
If this resonates, and you want practical tools for communicating with influence, in ways that make things better, not worse, here are a couple of ways to go deeper:
Communicate Powerfully on YouTube
Short, practical videos you can use in real moments - meetings, feedback, facilitation, leadership.
Become a CPLT
For trainers and facilitators wanting to bring Communicate Powerfully workshops into their workplace.
Public Course
A 2-hour virtual workshop with practical tools you can use straight away.
Workshops & Programmes
For teams ready to move from surface-level communication to real connection, accountability, and trust.
Keynotes & Facilitation
Bring Carly into your conference or event, creating spaces where people feel safe enough to be honest, and brave enough to grow.